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Are YOUR goals YOURS? Here's how you can find out.

Updated: Oct 13, 2022

Last week, I've touched knowing your why. Your why will lay the foundations for all endeavors you decide to pursue. The goals we select are driven by our whys... or are they? That's the real question. Are are our goals actually our goals? Or, have we simply taken on goals that someone else gave us?

You Never Complete Your Goals When They're Not YOURs

One basic tell-tell sign is, these goals do not get completed! The reason main reason behind this is, the goal did not originate from within YOU. YOU might have come across an idea, or worked with people who have set a goal, and felt like it should be your goal too... the list goes on and on.

Whatever. the case may be, YOU find that, it's not something that is satisfying to you. So it becomes easy to justify every reason not to work towards it.

Exhibit A: I was introduced to a company that I came to support their mission. I have gone to trainings and meetings where, other peoples' goals were heavily pushed onto others. I began setting goals that I thought I should have had based on what someone else was telling me. I never met those goals. I also didn't want to meet them after some time.

The hard part was trying to obtain a goal that isn't mine. In the end, you won't do it. -TCB

The Passion is Lacking When it's Not Your Goal

It may start out is an exciting and intriguing task. Especially, if everyone else is working on it. But, as soon as you are isolated, in your bed at night, with only your thoughts, you realize there's "nothing" there.

Here's an example: I use to work in clinics. I desired more responsibility at some point. I wanted to do something other than what I had been doing. I was told the only way to really do that was to get licensed. That meant, a bachelor's and master's degree. I completed my bachelor's degree with a specialization that allowed me to obtain a license at the bachelorette level. However, I was constantly prompted to get the master's degree.

I did not complete that master's program. I have no regrets!

For one, I knew that I didn't want to spend the rest of my career or years confined to clinical settings. Two, my foundation for this goal (master's degree) was faulty. It wasn't mine. The why was created for me (promotion). To my amazement, that 1st week of that master's program, I was assigned research into occupations that I could apply my education. I found many that didn't require a bachelor's degree. I learned quickly, that getting a M. Ed. was not my goal and that promotion was not MY why.

Sense of Fulfilling a Purpose When it IS YOUR Goal

When you set a goal for yourself, you have every intention on achieving it. You find that your mind begins to bring about the thoughts, that will bring about specific actions, and the completion of those actions will lead to the achievement of that goal. That is how you know it is yours. It appeals to your senses. You want to taste, smell, touch, hear, and see the consequences of that goal.

Take me, I have started my #debtfree journey in 2018. I wanted to and still want to experience the taste of financial freedom that I hear others talk about. I want to be able to give to those in need without having to set limits. I want to be able to tell my children we're going to take a trip and not have to worry how much it will cost us later. I want to see where all of my heard work towards this goal will feel and taste like once I've reached it. Which brings me to my last point.

Peace and Fulfillment Results, When YOUR goals are YOURS

You'll know that goal was yours once it's completed and you feel empowered. You feel like you've conquered something, and became the emperor of whatever it was, AND CAN'T NOBODY TELL YOU NOTHING.

Your dignity is magnified. Your very essence becomes enhanced. You may begin to believe you're indestructible. And, you're right! That's how you know that goal was yours!


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